Jay Cutler on the Oscars

“I don’t really go to the movies. I do Netflix. Also, I sure as hell didn’t have any kind of queer viewing party. If you ever see me at an event in a tux playing grab-ass with a bunch of people less talented than me, it’s probably an ESPY after party. I didn’t see any of the movies up for awards anyway. I heard there was one movie about Mila Kunis going down on Natalie Portman though, so I’ll probably Netflix that.”


Jay Cutler on Charlie Sheen

“I mean, I loved him in Hot Shots. Why do you ask? Did he do something to warrant a question about him?”


Jay Cutler on Lovie Smith’s Contract Extension

“You’re welcome.”


Jay Cutler on John Fox’s decision to name Kyle Orton the Broncos’ Starting QB

“Obviously, he had no good options. He had to choose between a guy with fetal alcohol syndrome and a misplaced fullback with a decent arm and a Jesus complex. This is what happens when you lose the best QB your franchise ever had. Elway and co. are living in my shadow.”


Jay Cutler on the Carmelo Anthony trade

“Yeah, who’d he play for? Denver? Fuck that bro, I know what it’s like to be stuck in Denver. It’s nothing but hippie chicks and skiing, and I don’t ski. Not that kind of skiing anyway.”


First reader question for Jay

Louis T wants to know:

“what did you think of rex grossman in the 09/10 season?”

“I’ll tell you what I thought of him, Louis. I think he played for Houston, never started a game, and went 3 for 9 passing in the one game he saw action in. Jesus Christ, what next? Does someone want to know what I thought about Brian St. Pierre’s 04/05 season with the Steelers? This is some really compelling shit here guys, thanks for this.”


Jay Cutler on Aaron Rodgers Partying in Vegas

“That wasn’t a story. He was here for a weekend. I’ve been here since Groundhog Day.”